Best Acceptance speech EVER, THE END, AMEN: TINA FEY

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These are a few of my favorite things . . . .

List seven things you love, don't think to hard, just write it down and see what you come up with off the top of your head, my list:

Chocolate
Cupcakes
Penis
Lipgloss
Shoes
Twitter
Books

Did a handwriting analysis . . . This is what happened:

You are highly energetic. You are a passionate, intense, vigorous person.

You are very extroverted and outgoing. You are loving, friendly, and supportive. However, you are also manipulative and controlling at times.

You are extravagant, over the top, and indulgent. You set trends and influence people.

You need a bit of space in your life, but you're not a recluse. You expect people to give you a small amount of privacy, and you respect their privacy as well.

You are somewhat traditional, but you are also open to change. You listen to your head and your heart.

You are a poor communicator. No one really knows exactly what you're getting at.

My Criteria for Unfollowing on Twitter:

My Criteria for Unfollowing on Twitter:

1. Never reply to my attempts to communicate with you. “Me Annie” taps my chest. “who you” Taps your chest

2. We have nothing what-so -fucking-ever in common.

3. Repeated tweets of the same dumb fucking thing.

4. And umm, you unfollow me first . . . it’s a matter of pride for this one.

Wah, wah, wahhhhhhhhhh. The end.

*Disclaimer: If you are really popular or hot, I may not unfollow you based these criteria. To be determined as I see fit in these cases. I am somewhat shallow. Sorry.

7 Twitter Pet Peeves (In no particular order)

(1) People who constantly say “twitter is boring”. Well darling, as the saying goes “if you’re bored then you’re boring” you may want to check that.

(2) Hypocrites. I don’t mean people who change their mind about here and there about how they feel about a particular topic. I do that all the time myself. I mean the chicks who will beat a person down to a pulp in one tweet only to turn around in another tweet and do the same themselves.

(3) Spammers posing as twitterers. People who ask to follow you and seem wholly legit, but turn out to be people who tweet about white teeth or improving your finances. To the left asshole.

(4) People whose entire goal on twitter is to get more followers. Twitter is only a popularity contest for some people, and I guess these people are either in high school or never left it.

(5) People who hide behind locked and secret accounts to hate. You are a coward. A COWARD. And we all feel sorry for you. I’ll write to Wizard of Oz to get you a mutherfucking backbone.

(6) Ten year olds who tweet and make Bieber a trending topic. While they may not all be ten years old, their brain is and that’s all that matters. BTW, my 9 year old has forsaken me and is making me take her to see him for her birthday. The7777s meet bullet to the head. Get acquainted.

(7) People who post the same tweet over and over for effect, for example, I will post a sample tweet from @asshole:
@asshole: JUSTIN BEIBER IS COMING TO AMERICA
@asshole: JUSTIN BEIBER IS COMING TO AMERICA
@asshole: JUSTIN BEIBER IS COMING TO AMERICA
@asshole: JUSTIN BEIBER IS COMING TO AMERICA
Yes, can you imagine seeing this shit in your timeline over and over? Me either.

Chances are you are somewhere in this list. If so, don’t fret my friend, I will not unfollow you I will just do my other pet peeve, rant about it and move on.

The End.